Narcissism has become the new normal, incentivized by society and culture. At its core, narcissism not only reflects insecurity in an individual, but appears to be manifested in a parallel insecurity in the world at large. The enticements of charm, charisma, confidence, and success can draw us in or blind us to the damaging truths of narcissism. The invalidation inherent in these relationships infects those who are in them with self-doubt, despair, confusion, anxiety, depression, and the chronic feeling of being “not enough,” all of which make it so difficult to step away and set boundaries. The illusion of hope and the fantasy of redemption can result in years of second chances, and despondency when change never comes. It’s time for a wake-up call. We need to learn to be better gatekeepers for our minds, bodies, and souls.
Session highlights:
Understand what narcissism actually is while differentiating it from narcissistic personality disorder
An overview of the incentivization of narcissism, incivility, and entitlement by society at large
An understanding of the impact of difficult personality patterns, including narcissism, and antagonism on the people in relationships with them
Simple takeaways on how to stay sane in the midst of the culture of narcissism, entitlement, and incivility
Dr. Campbell will present the current thinking on narcissism in the scientific community, with a focus on the structure of narcissism. There is an emerging agreement that there are different forms of narcissism, but these can be described with three basic traits. He will also discuss some of the ways narcissism spreads via social media, leadership, and attraction.
Session highlights:
The difference between grandiose and vulnerable narcissism (and NPD)
The Trifurcated Model of narcissism (TMN)
The basic association between narcissism and social media, leadership, and attraction
In this session we will establish a baseline understanding of the narcissistic parent and how never getting your needs truly met as a child impacts and creates what Terri has termed “Repeating Romantic Realities” (repeating the same painful, unfulfilling, and many times abusive relationship with narcissists). We will cover how your “downloaded love blueprint,” the way you experienced love, is impacting who you choose now and how to change that.
Session Highlights:
How to identify a narcissistic parent
How to identify your unique Downloaded Blueprint
The narcissism-codependency connection
The interdependence of healthy love
How healthy boundaries are essential for healing—and a happy life
Bonus Content
Adult Children of Narcissistic Parents Healing Starter Kit– Please enjoy Terri’s Healing Starter Kit which contains a downloadable PDF with questions and resources, plus a free self-love guided meditation and video links to vlogs on narcissism.
The focus of the presentation will be on understanding covert narcissism as a specific manifestation of narcissistic personality pathology. Abdul will draw key distinctions between covert and overt/grandiose narcissism, draw out the core psychological components of covert narcissism, and outline how the pathology manifests based on the understanding of its psychology. He will give examples of how covert narcissistic pathology manifests in relationships across various domains, including romantic. He will also touch on key markers to distinguish between covert narcissistic pathology (as a personality disorder) and covert narcissistic vulnerability.
Session Highlights:
Understanding the key distinctions between covert/vulnerable and overt/grandiose narcissism
Understanding how these distinctions are a function of differences in temperament between individuals with covert and overt narcissism
How the core pathological features of narcissistic personality disorder are operating in both covert and overt narcissism, even though they appear very different
Understanding the critical role of schadenfreude to explain how covertly narcissistic individuals exploit others
Distinguishing between covert narcissism when it manifests as a personality vulnerability rather than as a disorder (NPD)
Dr. Bandy X. Lee is a professor at Yale and the author of The Dangerous Case of Donald Trump. In this interview with Jeffrey Rutstein, Bandy discusses the ethical considerations facing mental health professionals, the universal pledge known as the Declaration of Geneva, and the very real reasons for concern about the future of our country and our world under our current president’s leadership.
Session Highlights:
The story behind the bestselling book
Why medical neutrality does not mean silence
The danger of normalizing a malignant situation
Why tyranny over the mind is the greatest form of oppression
Dr. Craig Malkin is a clinical psychologist and lecturer for Harvard Medical School and a contributing writer for The Dangerous Case of Donald Trump. In this interview with Jeffrey Rutstein, you’ll learn about the full spectrum of the trait known as narcissism, including how to approach treating people with NPD. Dr. Malkin will also discuss the complexities and subtleties of narcissism, overcoming attachment insecurity, and the need to build bridges that bring people together, not walls that divide us.
Session Highlights:
The difference between healthy and unhealthy narcissism
The three Es: exploitation, entitlement, and empathy impairment
The concept of “Echoism”
Narcissism in leadership and politics
Session Four – Narcissism in a Patriarchal Society
I will discuss seven aspects of narcissism—shamelessness, magical thinking, arrogance, envy, entitlement, exploitation, and bad boundaries—with examples of how each might manifest in a variety of work settings. Participants will learn to identify the underlying power dynamics in order to be better able to manage the challenges of this pervasive pathology. I will also discuss the importance of understanding one’s own “buttons,” disengaging from no-win situations, and protecting boundaries.
Session Highlights:
The different “flavors” of narcissism
Why work environments are vulnerable to narcissistic processes
What you must do if you don’t want to quit (or be fired)
Traditional masculinity is founded upon two central lies: dominance and invulnerability. As humans we are neither, leaving most men dogged by anxiety and shame. Also central to traditional masculinity is the theme of: “regeneration through violence,” the shift from feelings of inadequacy to indignation and rage. We will look at the roots of men’s narcissism and what to do about it.
Session Highlights
Traditional masculinity is founded on two lies, leaving men vulnerable to anxiety and shame
Shame can be successfully (if disastrously) self-medicated with grandiosity
Healthy self-esteem is WITH—neither better nor lesser than
Bonus Content
From Boys to Men: a Conversation with Terry Real and Carol Gilligan – In this conversation with Terry Real and Carol Gilligan, we’ll explore the latest research on boys’ development, the state of masculinity in America, what women need to know about men, and why Relational Life Therapy is particularly effective with men.
Narcissism is often seen in a negative light. But what if narcissism were a critical stage in our development that we all must go through—both individually and as a society? In this presentation, bestselling author and renowned intuitive Caroline Myss shares her vision of a new “model” of the human being—a fully empowered, fully mature, conscious individual.
Session Highlights
The archetypal force known as the narcissist
The great turning point of the Nuclear Age and where we find ourselves now
Embracing the shadow and moving through the dark side of narcissism
Narcissism is being incentivized and encouraged by modern society and culture. This trend, spread through multiple facets of our everyday lives, has resulted in a shift of our ideals and values. With emphasis on what this means for younger generations, this presentation explores the effects of such influences on how we think and act.
Session Highlights
The ways in which society encourages and rewards narcissistic behaviors
How the trend of narcissism is influencing our lives and values
Alternative values to encourage and pursue for a more meaningful life
Empaths and narcissists often have a toxic attraction to each other, explains Dr. Judith Orloff. Empaths get caught up in a narcissist’s charisma, charm, and promise of love and connection, but full-blown narcissists have what science calls “Empath Deficient Disorder,” which means they are not capable of empathy as we know it. Narcissists love empaths since they thrive on adoration and unconditional love. Dr. Orloff advises that empaths beware!
Session Highlights
How to identify a narcissist
Protection strategies for empaths
Narcissist techniques such as gaslighting and beating down your self-esteem
The advantage of provoking a conflict with a narcissist to reveal their true colors early on
The cord-cutting technique to end a relationship with a narcissist
Bonus Content
The Narcissist Survival Guide – A short, practical survival guide for dealing with narcissists and excerpts about protecting yourself from narcissists from Dr. Orloff’s new book Thriving as an Empath.
Narcissism is often portrayed as a frightening or monstrous condition, and we are usually invited to see narcissistic people as less-than-fully human or even as evil. Hyper-empathic people are also portrayed as being particularly susceptible to narcissistic people, as if empathy is a sign of fragility and poor discernment. Yet there is a deeper story here, and a far more empathic way to approach narcissistic behavior and narcissistic people.A note about terminology: Karla McLaren uses the identity-first term autistic people in this presentation, which comes from the autism-positive neurodiversity approach she champions in her work, her research, and her own life as a multiply learning-disabled person. Of course, she also uses different terminology if disabled people themselves prefer it.
Session Highlights
Exploring the situations that lead to self-absorption and an inability to fully connect with others
Humane and non-pathologizing ways to identify narcissistic tendencies so that you can decide how you want to engage
Understanding the necessity of both narcissism and empathy, and retrieving narcissism from the shadows.
Bonus Content
Empathic Communication: Getting Into Sync with Others – This chapter excerpt from The Art of Empathy will help you understand the difference between empathic communication techniques and true empathic engagement. This excerpt includes five empathic communication practices and information on how to understand and support emotions in yourself and others.
A.H. Almaas is a spiritual teacher, author, and founder of The Diamond Approach®. In this presentation, he will discuss how narcissism becomes an impediment to spiritual awakening (or self-realization), and how spiritual practice is necessary in order for a person to alleviate the symptoms and disturbances of narcissism. “The soul’s estrangement from its true nature is the basis of narcissism,” he explains. “The self of the average individual is deeply and fundamentally narcissistic. The complete resolution of narcissism will elude us until the achievement of self-realization.”
Session Highlights
Narcissism as the loss of Essential Identity
Why we can’t separate our psychology from our spirituality
How understanding the spiritual nature of the self can help us to understand even severe forms of narcissistic disturbance
This presentation will provide a brief overview of 2 Buddhist suttas that speak to the difficulties of relationships with narcissistic wounded people. Dr. Duran will also describe spiritual tools such as mindfulness and equanimity practices as refugees during challenging times.
Session Highlights
Our own individual experience of working with narcissism in our lives
Notions of conceit (mana) and vipallasa (wrong view) in Buddhist suttas and their applicability to understanding narcissism
Mindfulness and compassion practice as spiritual tools in working with difficult individuals
Healthy confidence promotes resilience and well-being. We develop this largely through receiving empathy, appreciation, and cherishing from others, but if these are in short supply, we feel insecure and inadequate, hungry for approval, and sensitive to slights. Happily, we can heal the past and grow into the future with the power of positive neuroplasticity. This presentation will explore practical ways to weave self-worth and optimism into your nervous system.
Session Highlights
The social brain: why we need healthy “narcissistic supplies,” especially in childhood
What happens when we do not get the empathy, caring, and appreciation we naturally need
How to heal the hungry heart and “hardwire” healthy confidence into your brain
Bonus Content
Feeling Cared About Practice – In this guided practice, you will explore the different ways of caring by thinking about someone that you care about, and also thinking about someone that cares about you.
There is far more to narcissism than the commonly used insult or accusations made daily. The reality is that it ranges from extreme selflessness to arrogance and grandiosity. We all must find the healthy middle ground and promote that in ourselves and those closest to us.
Session Highlights
The spectrum of narcissism
The healthy parts of narcissism
How to promote healthy narcissism in the ones we love
This presentation will focus on survivors involved in a romantic relationship with a narcissist who is abusive. Neurological and psychological symptoms commonly associated with intimate partner emotional abuse will be explored. The importance of self-care, as well as specific approaches to soothe and calm the brain, will be presented.
Session Highlights
How the symptoms of narcissistic personality disorder often present within an intimate relationship
Why many survivors struggle with shame during and after the relationship
Neurocircuitry commonly associated with emotion dysregulation in the aftermath of a relationship with a narcissist
The impact of traumatic stress on the brain within an intimate relationship
Self-care approaches to ease emotion dysregulation (i.e., pain, withdrawal, stress) when the relationship has ended
Narcissism presents particular challenges and pain points for partners in relationship. This difficulty can be addressed through understanding the missed developmental experience and courageously engaging in that task as an adult. By moving through the experiential processes of inflation, deflation, integration, and maturation, narcissistic partners can heal deeply unsatisfying relational patterns and co-create a genuine love relationship. This practice generates greater relational agency, compassion, and a more resilient sense of self.
Session Highlights
Identify the narcissistic traits that block genuine connection
Understand three essential tasks that transform narcissistic immaturity or injury into growth and relational agency
Apply the process of Dyadic Self-Development in your own relationship or with your clients
Bonus Content
5 Essential Moves to Grow Beyond Narcissism in Your Relationship – “Having met with thousands of couples over twenty five years as a marriage coach and couple therapist, I’ve seen how unworked narcissism gets in the way of real intimacy and connection. I’m talking about garden-variety narcissism that doesn’t make headlines or warrant a psychiatric diagnosis, but does prevent a couple from getting the most joy and satisfaction from their relationship. Here are my top five suggestions for how to begin to break free from this type of self-distortion to create dynamic, adult love.” — Jeff Pincus, MSW, LICSW
Session Ten – Surviving and Thriving in the Age of Narcissism
This presentation will differentiate self-compassion from self-esteem. Self-esteem is an evaluation of self-worth that requires feeling special and above average, and is sometimes linked to narcissism. Self-compassion, on the other hand, involves treating oneself with warmth and kindness even when encountering failure or feelings of inadequacy. Self-compassion also helps people to stand up to narcissists. Yin self-compassion involves comforting and soothing one’s pain, while yang self-compassion involves drawing boundaries and saying no. Both forms of self-compassion are necessary when dealing with narcissists.
Session Highlights
The difference between self-compassion and self-esteem
Yin and yang self-compassion
How both forms of self-compassion are needed to stand up to narcissists
“Never has the true self been as endangered as it is now in human beings.” So begins Dr. Clarissa Pinkola Estés, the renowned Jungian psychoanalyst, author, and cantadora (keeper of the old stories). In this presentation, she shares insights into the nature of narcissism, as exemplified by the story of Bluebeard.
